Sunday, June 16, 2013

Rosemary Triscuits: The Snack of Satan

Dear Rosemary Olive Oil Triscuits: You are evil.  You are so goddamned tasty, and yet I could only eat three of you before I was full and my stomach began to hurt.  Oh, but then you tempted me with your wily ways, beckoning me with your herb-flavored, woven-wheat-y, artificially-enhanced, salty, savory deliciousness and I ate a fourth...but it backfired, didn't it, because you did not get digested.  And you HURT coming up. Why did I even let you into my life?  I can't even eat enough of you to get a traceable amount of protein out of the effort.  You are useless to me.

I hate you.  Go to hell.



Asshole.



1 comment:

  1. I agree! Rosemary Triscuits are evil because they look healthy (Yay! Whole grains!) but there are not healthy (Boo! Too much salt!).

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